Act I Scene 2                            [Enter EMPEROR,  POLICE; WISHEE-WASHEE from other side.]
EMPEROR;  You there!
W-W;     Who where?  Me here?
EMPEROR; Yes, you!  Have you seen two ladies?
W-W;     Ladies round here?  You have got to be joking.
EMPEROR; Do you know who I am?
W-W;     Should I?
EMPEROR; I am the Emperor!
W-W;  And I’m Santa Claus.  Pull the other one, mate.
EMPEROR; Arrest him!  [POLICE seize W-W]
W-W;     Oh, not again!  You mean – you really are…
EMPEROR; Yes, I really am!
W-W;     Put me down!
POLICE; Why?
W-W;     I can’t kow-tow in mid-air!  [They drop him, he kneels.]
EMPEROR ; That’s better!  Now. My daughter and her attendant have gone off. For an adventure. Have you seen them?
W-W;     No, your Imperial Majesty.
EMPEROR; Lucky.  I intend to execute everyone who has.  If you do see them, come and tell me at once.
W-W;     But then you’ll have me executed.
EMPEROR; You will die in the proud knowledge that you have done your duty.
[Snaps his fingers, POLICE follow him off.]
W-W; [starting to call after them] I’ve just remembered – Oh.  Um.  What do I do now?  That must be the girls with Aladdin.  Should I tell the Emperor?  And get Aladdin and me executed?  It’s my duty to the emperor.  I think I should.  Oh, yes, I should – [etc]Oh, all right then, you’ve convinced me. [or Well, you might argue a bit!]
[Enter ALADDIN, BALDROUBADOUR in dollv-bird outfit, CASS with bags and boxes.]
ALADDIN ; I think I may say the ladies have enjoyed themselves.
W-W;     Good.
BALDROUB; Look at this! And this! We've bought half the town!
W-W;     Great.
CASSANDRA; We'd have saved hundreds of pounds if we hadn't spent so much.
W-W;     Fine.
BALDROUB; Aladdin, I've had such a day - oh, such a day! I've never had anything like it before.
ALADDIN; My pleasure, princess.
BALDROUB; My life's been so dull - what? What did you call me?
ALADDIN; Princess. My princess.
CASS;    She's not your princess. Oh, I knew this would happen.
ALADDIN; No, she's not mine. But I'm hers. Forever and ever.
BALDROUB; Oh, don't spoil it, Aladdin. Please.
                                              [Song, ALADDIN and BALDROUB;  whatever you fancy]
BALDROUB; [speaks]  I can't be yours. Really I can’t.  [They move together]
CASS;    This is against all the rules. She can't fall in love as if she was as common as you.
W-W;     Thank you.
CASS;    You’re welcome.  She can't just marry any scruff like you that takes her fancy.
W-W;     Thank you.
CASS;    You’re welcome.  She has to marry the prince her father chooses for her. It’s the rule.  She belongs to the Emperor.
W-W;     And he wants her back.
CASS;    How do you know?
W-W;     He’s out looking for her, with every bobby he’s got.  And Clyde.  And he’s going to execute anybody -
CASS;    Who's set eyes on her? That's the rule. I knew something dreadful would happen when she broke the rules. Didn’t I know something dreadful would happen? [Hoots the oo’s.] I knew it. I knew it.
W-W ;    So she blew it! Stop saying you knew, and say what we're going to do!
CASS;    We've got to get her back into the palace without anybody seeing her - anybody else.
W-W;     And without anybody knowing that we’ve seen her, or we’re for the cheap and chippy chopper on a big black block.