Act I Scene 1.                 [Apple Auntie waves her stick, unnoticed.  Lights change to rainbow]
Dame;      What’s happened?
AA;         We’re in the end of a rainbow.
Jack;        We can’t be.  It’s scientifically impossible.
AA;         Rainbows is magic, no science.  Ye canny be in yer ain rainbow, no, but ye can be in somebody else’s.
Jill;          I suppose a rainbow has to come down somewhere.
Jack;        That’s crazy.  It can’t be true.
Dame;      Well, dear, it’s happening, so it must be.  Pretty, isn’t it? 
AA;         Weel, whit are ye goin’ tae wish for?
Jack;        Wish?  You mean we get three wishes just for being in a rainbow?
AA;         Dinna be greedy, Jack.  One wish each.  An’ it canna be for yersel’, mind.  Wishes for yersel’ never come true.
Dame;      I wish Jack could marry his millionairess.
Jill;          You should get married too.
Dame;      Oh, yes!  But it would take a saint to put up with me!
Jill;          Okay, mum, I’ll wish for a saint to come and marry you!
Jack;        And I’ll wish for Prince Adrian to fall madly in love with Jill and marry her instead.  That’s us all settled.
Jill;          Oh, Apple Auntie, none of us thought to wish for you!
AA;          Ach, I’ve got a’ I need.  But I’ll wish for ye tae find a way tae keep yer fire in, so’s a body can aye get a drap tea when she visits!
Jill;          That’s cheating!  It’s a way of wishing for yourself!
AA;         It’s nothin’ o the no such which!  Aye, there’s it goin’ noo.  Rainbows never hings aboot.   [rainbow effect fades]           Nor I can’t, neither. I’ll away back tae my shop.  Bye-bye!

Act II Scene  3
Jasper;   [peers at Prince Adrian’s face]  You’re not the prince, even if you do look a bit like him!   You can’t fight both of us alone.
Jack;      Who says he’s alone?  [PA,  Jack face Lurk & Jasper, backs to  I got in while he kept you busy, Uncle Jasper.   Where’s Alexis?
Jasper;   Alexis?  Oh, her!  The lady who is to be my wife?  [Lavvy takes Blunderbuss from wall, behind PA, Jack]
Jack;      Over my dead body!
Jasper;  That can be arranged!  Tell me, what would you do if I said there was somebody behind you?
Jack;      Laugh – that’s an old one!
Jasper;    So laugh.  Lavvy, please…[Lav threatens Jack, PA; Jack & PA shoved down secret panel to dungeon]  Well done, guards! 
Lav;       Do we get a bonus?
Jasper;   Not that splendid!  [Doorbell]  More of Jack’s friends?  Deal with them, Lavvy. [She rubs fingers]  Oh, very well.  [gives money]
Lav;       [pockets money] And Lurk’s, sir.
Jasper;     What?  [doorbell]  Oh, very well.  This is blackmail!  [gives money]
Lav;        It’s the example we get.  Thank you, sir.  [pockets money]
Jasper;     I thought that was Lurk’s!
Lav;         I’m his manager.
[Exit Lav.  Lurk returns behind screen, starts another bottle]
Jasper;     Ready for them, Lurk?
Lurk;        Hic!
Jasper;     Sh!  [goes to light candles where papers are hidden, but -                      Enter St G, Dame.]
Jasper;    Ah, good evening, Jessica.  What a pleasant surprise to see you and – er –
Dame;      Jasper, this is the dragon man.
Jasper;    David Attenborough?
St G;         Saint George am I, I’ve come to see              The head o’ the Paper family.
I’ve come to ask for your permission              To wed your sister-in-law.
Jasper;     Perdition!
Dame;    [to St G] Go on, dear George, you’re doing fine.  Of darling Jack I see no sign, but –
Jasper;     Let me check I’ve got this right.                     You are Saint George, a noble knight.
You want to marry Jessica.
St G;                       I do.
Jasper;      Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.  Why am I talking in rhyme?
Dame;        Catching, isn’t it?